The eulogy, delivered by Ardeshir Radpour, Sunday, May 4th at Medjool Lake, Empire Polo Club, Indio. Sharing tears, laughter, personal moments of joy and pain, in what was, and is, the Celebration of Sue Sally Hale. We share with those who could not attend, the following excerpts:
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Without a doubt, this is one of the most difficult moments for anyone to find the words that would suffice as honorable enough to pay respects to such a legend. To stand before the memory of such a woman and the presence of such a distinguished friends of hers, truly puts a person in a position of reservation. It should not be the intention of any of us to try and find words that will ease the grief which has come upon our hearts, or to honor her with that which is due, for we will surely fail. Such a task is far beyond the mechanics of words. But let us celebrate the gift that she was in our lives.
Now I find myself in a position, which desperately seeks words to truly pay homage to such a woman, and Sal, well her words from now on will echo in our hearts in the form of our guardian angel.
She was truly a mother to all of us in the polo community. She made us swallow the medicines of life and polo which we did not want, to see the lessons and values we didn't see, to behave and perform the way that is proper of conduct in a game ever so maturing and modernizing in the battle fields of modern sports, and finally to live and breath with a code of honor which upheld All, on equal terms. No rank of any sort meant anything to her other than honorable actions, which upheld the right of each and everyone of us on equal terms, regardless of money, talent, equipment, horses, handicaps and any of the other things that we find to mark a division between us. She made herself the division lines of battle so that we could all get along better with each other.
It goes without saying that what I learned from her was perseverance and patience. He who cannot persevere is one who is not growing as a person and merely waiting for their demise. She taught me patience with horses and players. She taught me how to make with that which I had. She taught me to not lose my cool on the polo field, and made me feel horribly guilty if I lost my cool with the horses.
I have my chance to tell you what I had not told anyone. Two conversations that I had with Sal.
The first. One day, after my first major grass game, that she was at, well, major for me at the time. Sal said that she wanted to talk to me about something. She asked me "Ardeshir, be honest with me, when you ride, what are you thinking? You ride as if there is something going on in your head, as if there is another aura about you or something like that and its quite apparent to everyone, what is it?" I remarked to her, "Sal, you know how when people get ready for a game, they put on there game face and walk onto a polo field and get ready for a polo game on a polo field with other polo players. I don't think that way. For me its walking onto a massive arena, but the seats are "Above" and the spectators are "The Greats" that I have studied and have a tremendous amount of admiration and respect for, such as Cyrus the Great, Alexander, Genghis Khan, and some non-horsemen such as Martin Luther King and Eleanor Roosevelt, all different types of people that I have an immense amount of respect for. So I ride to keep them proud of me. I hope they see me as a man that is seasoned, and as a horseman worthy of respect and honor that is truly embodied in the word chivalry. If I don't behave properly or ride properly, I feel that they will look negatively on me, and walk away thinking that I am still a boy. You Sal, will be up there one day. You will sit with them and judge, even though I know you judge now. But now I can argue with you. Then I won't be able to. Then I have to just show myself to you and hope you give me your approval and I honor you just as I try and honor them. One day Sal, you will hold a seat next to those Greats."
The second. Many, many, many times I would talk to her about all that she has done for polo and horsemanship. How she has always approached it and upheld the notions and ideals of horsemanship and sportsmanship. How number one was always the horse, and number two the player. But players amongst players were always equal and fair. That it bothered me so much that so many people would walk by her and not respect what she had done for the sport and in particular for them, especially women. That she would have to die to be a legend. But I would always tell her that she is a legend in my eyes, while she is alive. That we as humans can be so ungrateful when someone is alive, but then celebrate them or recognize them when they die. I would tell her, that to me, she is a living legend. That was the only time I would ever see her quiet and without a remark. The only time I would ever see her not say a word about something I said.
Sal - for the first time I can talk without you interrupting me with some ridiculous task to do or some thought, that I have no idea where you got the nervous tick to talk about. I will use a word that you so much hated to be used… Woman.
Woman, you are so dear to all of us.
Woman, thank you for all that you taught us.
Woman, thank you for all the hell that you put us through.
Woman thank you for doing so much that so many others lacked the courage or vision to take on.
Woman, thank you for having the courage to show us what a true gift "woman" is to mankind and having the courage to thaw out so many who were still left in the ice of an archaic and bygone era.
Woman, thank you for doing your part to correct the wrongs of so many, so that we don't have to live with such burdens.
And woman, thank you for showing us the beauty that is truly the nature of caring.
You and your family paid a huge price and laid a sacrifice on the altar of what it truly the American Spirit and willingness to fight for that which is right, so that others do not have to. That burden, so solemnly yours. You left with us wonderful examples to live by, in your lessons, your children, and your legacy. It's now our responsibility to uphold and carry forward what you have done.
Regardless of what faith we have or do not have, what spiritual beliefs we have or do not have, or ideologies we follow, we are all grateful for having you as a gift and vision in our lives. I would say rest in peace Sal, but I know for you there is no rest, not even in heaven. I'm sure there are things that you have managed to find to correct even there, but one thing you will not have to worry about my dear friend, horses there will tread much lighter than here, for they carry you on their golden wings.
Ardeshir Radpour - Excerpts from eulogy, May 4, 2003 - Medjool Lake, Empire Polo Club
Sue Sal was a lady that I feel all women in the sport of Polo looked up to and respected. She was a mentor with a heart of gold. Greatly missed and never forgotten as she made her mark on the entire world. --Susan Bolinger-Pierce and Kimberlee (Bolinger) Kramarczyk
My earliest recollections are of meeting Sue Sally when I was 4 years old. I wanted to ride horse so bad, so my parents
lined me up for riding lessons with Sue Sally. At the time she had a barn on Westridge Road and would ride by my home on lower Mandeville
Canyon to pick me up. I remember one day when were went out for a ride, we stopped by her Mom’s house to visit. Just as we approached, she introduced me to their neighbor, Ronald Reagan.
As I grew up, I rode for Jack and Andy Smith, close neighbors on Mandeville. We rode all the way to Will Rodgers Polo Fields
each Sunday. I took a few clinics, practiced a little arena polo and spent hours at C.D. Le Blanc’s polo cage practicing. I rode for the Smith’s for 14 years, before heading off to college.
During my teenage years, I worked in Carmel, as a counselor and cook…Brook and Stormy were tiny kids. Dawn was lovingly referred to as “Lumpy” by Sue Sal, due to the number of bruises she accumulated. This is my first recollection of her pet “attack” goose.
As a young married gal, I really wanted to play polo and bought property in Paso Robles and Creston, California. When I would visit Sue Sal in
Simi Valley, she would set me up on a pony and give me 2 others to haul around, as we roared around the place, we would calmly carry on a conversation and discuss old times.
As an adult I visited Sue Sal several times In Simi and Pal Desert, the last time, I took my kids. I wanted them to meet this wonderful lady who had meant so much to me during my lifetime. She was living in the barn with her paintings and possums, while the house was leased out to several aging polo players.
I will always cherish the memories of the 50 years, I knew Sue Sally Hale!
Cherie Taylor Dalton
Eagle, Idaho
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If you would like to post a message about Sue Sally Hale on this Virtual Memorial please e-mail your submission to lynn@polobarn.com.
Thank You Sal!
The phone rings,
A baby cries,
A heart breaks,
No sets to ride tomorrow,
No more old mallets to swing,
No little white polo balls to knock through a chain link fence,
No more halters to match horses,
No more critters to dodge,
No more polo ponies to mount off of wooden mount blocks,
No more horses to tie to old hay rope knots,
No more friend,
No more mentor,
No more God given soul to share stories of old.
What are left now are cherished memories,
A heart filled with love,
A soul that is saddened and will be to the end.
Yet in the background a voice still calls,
Grab that halter,
That rope,
And that horse from the stall.
Get back on that pony,
Get that mallet in hand,
Knock that little white ball through those goal posts again!
Forever a student I will be,
Forever grateful to a mentor,
A friend,
That was a second Mother to me and my friends.
She taught me a passion for a game that I love,
She taught me respect,
She taught me to be strong,
She taught me the gates to her farm will forever be open,
I just need to stop by,
Say hello and start loping.
Thank you Sue Sal!
Words I wish I had spoken,
The last day we rode.
You will live forever in my heart my friend.
I don't like goodbyes,
I will see you again,
Happy Trails my friend until we ride again!
~ Thanks! Terri LaBelle Cruse
Being and Engineer, I am certainly no poet, but these thoughts are from my heart. It has taken several weeks for me to get the strength to sit down and write them down. I still find it hard to believe our friend Sue Sally is gone. I prefer to think she is still relaxing in the breezeway of her Coachella farm. My deepest sympathies go out to her wonderful family. She raised some great kids and loved them dearly.
I was fortunate, blessed really, to have the chance to ride with Sal on several occasions a few days before she passed. Somehow, I feel like this was meant to be. I hadn't seen Sal in more than a year. I had been pregnant with my beautiful new daughter Kasie. When I showed up at her place to say hello and introduce her to my daughter, as always it was like I saw her yesterday. She always had an amazing way of remembering just where our last conversation left off, and would pick it up from there. She always made me feel like part of her family as she did for every soul that set foot on her farm. I complained about how out of shape I felt. That my back hurt and I still had a good 30 lbs to shed. Before I knew it, Sal had disappeared. She shortly returned with a women's sports catalogue in hand. She opened the catalogue and dog eared a page and handed to me. She pointed and said, „ This is the best damn sports bra ever made! Buy one and get your butt back in the saddle.‰ She proceeded to order me to grab a horse and take out a set. She joined me of course. That ride felt so good! It was like a breath of fresh air. Sal always had a knack to get me back on course. I left her ranch that day with a new will to ride again. To get back on my ponies, finish our polo arena and ride again. I thank her for that, along with many other things, including my wonderful husband Mark and my daughter Kasie, who would not be with me today if it were not for Sal. Now there is something I feel I need to do for her. There were a few things she said to me during that last visit that I really feel that I should share.
Stormie, Sal said she was so happy to hear that you had played polo recently. She said she had not seen you much, but was glad to know that you were playing. She also was very excited to see your daughters this summer and spoke of them often that day. She raved about what good little riders they turned out to be. I am sure you know all of this but I feel obligated to share this with you.
Ardisher, Sal said that you really have turned out to be a good polo horse trainer. I thought you would appreciate hearing that. I know you respected Sal and she respected you as well.
Arshia, I have already told you that Sal mentioned how trilled she was that you had met such a wonderful guy. She told me you were engaged and she was genuinely joyful. I know you were like one of her daughters.
Trails, Sal was all excited about coming up to pick up your rescue Opossum. She said you called her and had found a stray opossum and needed her help because you didn't know how to take care of it. She had planned to visit you to pick it up on Monday before she passed. I was supposed to meet her to ride on Tuesday. I don't know you well at all, but I just wanted you to know that your Mom spoke very highly of you, even to her friends that didn't know you well. She said she was so excited about the upcoming arrival of her new grand baby.
Sal had just finished setting up her art room and shared her latest work of art with me. It was an old pair of boots, jeans, shirt and hat that she had transformed into a table in the corner of her studio. She had just planted the final cactus in her cactus garden and said it was complete as she rushed out her latest puppy and shut the gate.
What an amazing soul.
My thoughts and sympathies are with Sal's family. Bless you all as your hearts heal.
~ Terri LaBelle Cruse
The “Polo Way of Life” gave me so much in my life, and it all started with meeting Sue Sally Hale. I started out completely green to polo, and due to my friendship with Sal, I became totally involved to the point of co-owning Moorpark Polo Club, the first USPA recognized club owned by women. For seven years, I watched Sal’s influence on others – everyone who participated in our club, other players we saw at tournaments, and especially all her students – they all loved Sue Sal. She had an unlimited enthusiasm for polo, and my daughter Rima and I were completely caught up in it. We loved all her kids as part of our own family. Sal used to tell me she wanted to “die with her boots on”- quickly, and with her horses around her. I am so sorry she is gone, but once again, she “did it her way”. My memories are too many to mention, but Sal made my life in polo so full. Thanks, Sue Sal. Patty Akkad
I was so sad to here about the passing of my Aunt Sue Sal by a friend who
lives in the desert. It was in the paper. I missed out on the memorial but I am
sure it was very special. When one of these memorials talked about camp and
Crownie, Bucky, Willy, and Thumper the tears just came. I don't know if she
ever knew the joy she gave to this little "city" girl who used to love going to
buy my cowboy boots and jeans for camp each summer in Carmel. I certainly
was no horsewoman but I just loved being around her. Everyone is right, she was
someone very, very special. I call it the "light", she had it tenfold. She
was larger than life. I first met her when my Uncle Alex was dating the
"indian woman with feathers and a cat draped over her shoulders. She was cool and
different and I was fascinated! I saw her play as "Alex Hale" in a polo
tournament at the Will Rogers Polo grounds. Being an athlete myself, I totally got
her "obsession" with her sport and what joy it brought her to play. I knew
all the kids as babies and me and my siblings spent a whole summer at their
house when times were challenging for our family. A cook, she was not. But, it
was always filling. :-) I'll never forget the times when we would ride the
horses down to the beach at Point Lobos for a bonfire and marshmellows. Sue Sal
would go into the ocean, way out, and play with the seals. She was the real
"Mother of Nature." To my cousins who I haven't seen for some time, "I know
you had to share your mother with the world but, never forget that she loved
you more than you can even imagine." I miss our times at Uncle Al's for
Thanksgiving, my sister Stephanie does too. Although we were never close, just know
that I knew you all when you were sweet, innocent little babies and you were
so cute and lovable. I miss Grandma Hale and your grandmother Susie so much.
You were so lucky to spend so much time with them. Aren't we all lucky to
have had these strong, incredible women in our lives. Although I never had
children, I am a school Principal now and I try my best to make a difference in the
lives of all of the children I am fortunate enough to have in my life. Your
mother did! Aunt Sue Sal, thanks for all you are and rest in peace that your
life was a life well spent. Bravo, little indian girl!!!!!
-Laura Ann Hale
Some friends and I were having discussions about early horse experiences tonight - we all have saluki dogs and live all over the country. I mentioned that I had ridden in Malibu and Sullivan Canyon in the mid/late 50s - first with a man named Egon Mertz and then with a young woman named Sue Sally Hale. What a coincidence that a friend now living in Portland grew up in Pacific Palisades overlooking Will Rogers Park and also rode with Egon Mertz and in Sullivan Canyon on Fridays! Another friend did a websearch for Sue Sally Hale and sent me the links. I have been sitting here reading the articles and the loving memories people have of her and thinking what an exceptional person she was. I am so sorry to learn she is no longer living, and I'm feeling quite sad about that.
I did see Sue Sal again at the Menlo Circus Club in Atherton, California when I was an adult and she was living in Carmel Valley, and I had a horse again, of course, but was involved with dressage and some jumping. My still happy memories of Sue Sal are the rides we took on weekend mornings in Sullivan Canyon on Elizabeth Whitney's thoroughbreds that Sue Sal was using for polo. The one I loved best was a heavily ticked grey, and the few of us lucky enough to be there rode through the hills on bareback pads, wending our way through the trees and shrubs growing on the hillsides.
I met Sue Sal at Deer Springs summer camp in Malibu in 1958, if my childhood memory is correct, when she was the riding instructor. When camp ended, my mother, who thought very highly of Sue Sal, found that she also taught riding during the rest of the year, and so the memorable weekend mornings on those gorgeous thoroughbreds came into my life.
And so, I thought I would share those very long ago memories of an exceptional woman who even in her young years managed to provide me with remembered pleasures 46 years later. I am very sad to know she is gone.
Best,
Laurie Lehman
Hollister, CA
zippydog@ix.netcom.com
I loved reading the Sue Sally memories and so sad when I heard of her passing three years ago. She had more fire in her than most and so her passing was especially shocking, surely death should not have come for her so soon.
Sue Sally taught me, along with so many others, to ride at her place called Sleepy Hollow Farms in Carmel Valley, in the late 1960's. The horses were Tiger, Jet, Sam, Gumdrop and Cecily, among others, now long gone. There was a gentle, older white horse there too; he took off with my friend, Bonnie, after a lesson one Saturday and she hasn't ridden since. Sleepy Hollow Farms was a magical place, off Robinson Canyon Road, before condos and SUV's. It was practically inaccessible by car during the winter--and this made it all the more magical. It was our own special place to trail ride and roam, without the watchful eyes of our parents. Sue Sally's house was over the river and parents usually picked their kids up at the house. We either waded in barefeet over the river or sometimes rode horses over it and took turns leading them back. I remember swimming in the river on horseback. The arena where we had lessons or shows was a good distance away from the barn and the whole ranch was circled by a trail that wound mysteriously through the woods. It was a well beaten path, a great one for exercising horses. We often rode out over the dirt road and climbed up the mountains on gorgeous trails that offered views clear to the ocean. We went wherever we wanted.
Sue Sally was ALWAYS on horseback, even during lessons. She'd race around and yell out directions, not loud, just right. She drilled us the old fashioned way, about the most important things. Keep your heels down, be still but, flexible. Clean your tack after each ride. Light hands. Her passion was clearly polo and on Sundays I often signed up to tack up, tape up, wrap tails and hot walk horses after the games were over. I watched her with amazement every time. She seemed larger than life, so strong and so passionate. She led the men around the field. She yelled. I remember the cliffs rising above the polo field. It wasn't a professionally marked or trimmed field. They played on a beautiful meadow that stretched out below Carmel Valley cliffs. I remember the sounds of the game, her voice rising above the others, the clack of the sticks, the rumble of the hooves pounding down the field. Huge designer homes now sit quietly on Sue Sally's polo field and the road is now paved and gated. The river has been moved and it's now just a creek. But if you go there, and look hard, you can still see Sue Sal and her team mates like old Mr. Hermann of the Farm Center, chasing, trying to catch her.
At this time of her life, I recall that she was always either pregnant or just having a baby. Once she delivered a baby (she advised it was quite safe to ride up until labor, as long as you always rode) she was back in the saddle before the umbilical cord was gone. Her children started riding before they could walk and like their mom, were rarely seen out of the saddle. I spent many memorable weekends at Sleepy Hollow, and many afternoons after school. As I look back on it now, I see that Sue Sally and those horses helped me get some through rough teen years. She gave me a passion and love for horses.
Here it is now, some 40 years later, and I started lessons and riding again three years ago, just about the same time Sue Sally passed.
Thank you Sue Sally. Love to her kids.
Cristina Fekeci
CFekeci@mbayaq.org
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I stumbled on the memorial for Sue Sally from years ago. Willis Allen called my Dad and I when she passed but neither of us made the trip. This is years late and I would understand if it wasn’t posted to the memorial site but then again maybe the kids look at the page from time to time.
My father first played with Sue Sally in the 50’s in LA. They were good friends for many years and he even had the chance to visit the Carmel Valley Ranch in the 60’s and we all played one Sunday.
I was in school at RLS from ’67 to ’71. I slept on the Hale sofa a lot of nights when I was supposed to be in the dorm. One of my favorite memories was the year that the team anchored by Prince Philip was touring the US and had stopped for an exhibition of Sunday pomp and grandeur at the Pebble Beach field. On the following Wednesday Sue Sally called me at school and said, “They’re on their way to Carmel Valley to play get out here!” I hitchhiked the ten miles to the house and then waded across the river to find her waiting with a horse for me. A half dozen of us were on the field when the royals came up the long dirt road in convertibles. That afternoon was the kind of event that only Sue Sally Hale could have pulled together.
The year Brooke was born she played until the eighth month and then the doctor told her she had to switch to umpiring. I worked for her the year after high school, she didn’t pay me enough to eat on and then she fired me; I loved her none the less. All my best to the Kids, the world is a better place because she was in it.
Thanks,
Bob Wintringer
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